I Lost You Once
by Miyth
Summary: Sano returns to Japan after five long years of traveling the world. What happens when the others realise that there is something wrong? Now Megumi must take care of a very very sick Sanosuke. Please R&R!
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer:** I do not and probably never will own Rurouni Kenshin.  
My writing is just for pleasure and I do not make a profit. 

**Authors note:** This is my second Sano/Megumi story I've written. It's a musical... I don't mean a songfic, but a musical. It has a few parts with songs in it, but it's mostly a Story line. Some song parts will be chapters apart so be patient, its hard to find enough songs to fit the story line. I might not use the whole song ether, and they are mostly country songs. Hope you like it! My idea for this fic was the fact that there is a very small chance of someone in 1880's Japan to travel the world and NOT come back with SOME kind of sickness. See if you can guess what's wrong with then rooster. Those darn mosquitos!

**I Lost You Once: A Sano/Megumi story**

**Prologue**

It was just another warm midsummer day at the Kamiya Dojo. Kenshin was sitting on the porch with a letter in hand and an excited face that matched the ones that surrounded him.

"He's coming back?" Yahiko asked, eyes still glued to the letter as he looked over the rurouni's shoulder. Kenshin scanned the parchment one more time, taking in the news.

Hello! Long time no, well, write I guess. Anyway, I'm in America at the moment, and I'm getting ready to leave soon. Guess where I'm going next.

Japan!

That's right, I'm coming home! I'm getting tired of all this traveling stuff.  
Besides I heard Tani finally kicked the bucket, about time.

I'm leaving in a few days, so I should show up in about a month from when you get this. See you soon!

Sagara Sanosuke

"It seems so, de gozaru" He said after reading the letter once again. The thought of his best friend finally coming home was wonderful, but a little overwhelming. After all, it had been five years.

"So I guess the rooster is finally coming home," Megumi said, taking the letter to read it for herself. She had been visiting from Aizu for a few days now, and had decided to stay for a few more weeks once she saw how much more work Genzai-sensei had since she had left.

"I can't wait to see him again!" Kaoru exclaimed shifting a sleeping Kenji in her lap. "When he comes back we'll have a big dinner to celebrate!"

"I just hope you don't scare him away with you cooking. He'll probably think he had a better chance in Americ-"

THWAP

"Itaiiiii! What was that for? I was just warning Busu!" Yahiko sat rubbing the lump on his head delivered by Kaoru's bokken.

"What did you call me Yahiko-CHAN?"

"Don't call me '-chan'! I'm fifteen!"

Megumi handed the letter back to Kenshin, her eyes still glued to it. "I just hope he took care of his hand while he was away" she said through Kaoru and Yahiko's insults and yells. "I worked hard on that thing..."

Kenshin smiled.

**A/N:** Well here's the first chapter! Er, it's a little short nn' I promise that the rest will be a lot longer. Besides, this is just a prologue, so of course it's going to be short!  
Anyways, I'll be done with the next chapter soon. Please review! Flames are welcome!


	2. Home At Last

**Disclaimer:** I do not and probably never will own Rurouni Kenshin.  
My writing is just for pleasure and I do not make a profit. 

Also, I do not own the song "I'm Coming Home Again"

**A/N:** Here's the next chapter! Poor Sano's gotta head ache, heh. Well, hopefully this chapter will make up for the shortness of the Prologue. Enjoy!

**I Lost You Once**

**Chapter 1: Home At Last**

_(I'm coming home again)_

_I'm not as crazy as I used to be   
Some of my devils upped and left me free   
To find a quiet space   
I'm not as out of place_

_I'm not as lonely as I was before   
I don't go in 'less there's an open door to leave by   
I'm starting to believe my own existence has a right to be_

Sagara Sanosuke walked down the old familiar streets of Tokyo. It was mid-day and the sun was slowly making it's way from the middle of the sky to kiss the horizon below. Sano had been back in Tokyo for a few hours now, but before he could go to the Kamiya dojo, he had had a few things that he needed to do first, like make sure he had a place to stay. All that aside now, he made his way downtown, excited about his long awaited return to his friends.

_And I'm comin' home again   
It's been too long a time   
Gettin' back what's mine   
And I can't remember why I went away   
But it's lookin' now like maybe I can stay_

_The poets cried for dreams they never saw   
The only certainty is nothin's sure   
And most things stay the same   
Or go back where they came_

He turned a corner and walked some more, grinning to himself that he had not forgotten the way, even after five long years. Before he knew it, he was standing in front of the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu Dojo. He found it surprisingly difficult to simply reach out his hand and open the gate; it seemed all so familiar. His home was beyond that gate, a makeshift home that he now could not understand why he left in the first place.

_And though my answers still are undefined   
By takin' chances I can start to find some reasons   
Somethin' to believe in   
I can make it through   
I can make it through_

He took in a deep breath and let it out slowly, lifting his hand to the wood and gently pushing against it. The gate creaked open. '_Just like it use to_' Sano acknowledged the sound that use to annoy him, but now seemed so wonderful.

The gate opened and Sano was meet with two bright blue eyes staring back at him, belonging to a stunned Kaoru; Kenshin right behind her, holding a small boy who was obviously his son. They must have been about to leave somewhere when Sano had opened the gate.

"Sa... Sanosuke! You're back!" Kaoru smiled widely and flung her arms around the kenkaya excitedly.

"Glad to see ya Jou-chan." he said, allowing himself to be hugged.

She stepped back to stand next to her husband and child, a little embarrassed by her sudden outburst.

"Welcome home Sano!" Kenshin greeted his friend with his trademark rurouni smile. He was back at last.

Sanosuke smiled at the ex-rurouni "I see you cut your hair Kenshin; and who's this?" He looked at the little boy in Kenshin's arms who was playing with the ends of the ex-rurouni's hair. The child turned his view to the new man and stared at him innocently as he sucked on his little fingers.

Kenshin shifted the boy into a more comfortable position. "This is Kenji, de gozaru." Kaoru softly put a hand on her husbands shoulder and smiled up at Sano. "Our son!" She said, smiling, as they all walked back into the yard.

Sanosuke's smile only got bigger at the news. "Really? It's about time you two got married!" Just then, Yahiko walked around the side of the dojo, seeing Sano and running over excitedly to his second idol. Sanosuke looked down at him with a cocky grin. Yahiko had gotten taller, and much more defined, an obvious sign of the time that had gone by.

"Wow Yahiko, you ain't a kid anymore are ya?" Sano said good naturedly. Yahiko just shrugged and jabbed a thumb in Kaoru's direction.

"Tell that to Busu here."

"Ya-hi-koooooo" Kaoru approached, pushing up her kimono sleeve. Sano just laughed. '_Just like old times..._'

_And I'm comin' home again   
It's been too long a time   
Gettin' back what's mine   
And I can't remember why I went away   
But it's lookin' now like maybe I can stay_

Kaoru proceeded to chase Yahiko around with death threats, while Kenshin continued to get reacquainted with his old friend.

"We were just thinking about going to the Akobeko, de gozaru. I think it would be a good place to have dinner and celebrate your arrival, how about it Sano?"

Akobeko food. _**Real**_ Japanese food, and not the crap that you were forced to eat on ships. Not the foreign meals that he had been made to get use two for five years. Now that was something he looked forward to.

"Alright! Sounds good to me!" Sano grinned, claping his hands together, not quite able to hold back the excitement at the posibility of food, Kenshin just smiled.

A small 'ahem' from the engawa caught Sano's attention and turned his direction towards it. There, sitting quietly on the paneled wood, was Megumi.

_Oh, and I'm comin' home again  
It's been too long a time   
Gettin' back what's mine   
And I can't remember why I went away   
But it's lookin' now like maybe I can stay_

She had been watching the entire time from her comfortable spot on the porch and had decided to finally make herself apparent. Sano smiled softly at her.

"Kitsune." Sano said with an all too familiar grin.

"Tori-atama. I see you made it back in one piece. You must have learned something out there."

"And I see your tongue is as sharp as ever. I'm glad to see you missed me." They shared a knowing smile.

> >> > >> > >> > >> > >> 

"I see. So the fox is only here on a visit to help out Genzei-sensei, huh?" Sano and the rest of them were all seated at the Akobeko, around one of the stove tops that sat in the middle of the booths. Sano scratched the back of his head with a disappointed look. "And here I thought you were waiting for me" He said with mock sadness. "I bet that's just the cover story though" he added teasingly, a cocky grin back on his face.

Megumi just rolled her eyes. "Baka, I have much better things to do then wait for a rooster who decided to fly the coop." She gave a sly smile and continued her delicate eating. Sano just continued to grin. He had already downed his share of food and then some.

"So what's America like Sanosuke?" Yahiko leaned forward in question, a rice bowl in one hand and chopsticks in the other. "That's where you were last, ne?"

Sano leaned back and closed his eyes, deep in thought. "Nice place, but I wouldn't want to live there. It's amazing how much more stuff they've got then Japan" He paused a moment and Megumi noticed his eyebrow twitch. Unbeknownst to the rest of them, Sanosuke had a very bad head ache. Sano took a breath and continued. "I was in Peru before that, but I didn't stay too long 'cause I couldn't stand the bugs."

Kaoru shivered and stuck her tongue out "Ewww, I'm with you!"

Sano's lips curled into a mischievous smile, his eyes glinting. "You think that's bad, Jou-chan, then you should'a seen the size of the cockroaches in India" He paused for effect "The ones I saw were about a foot long." Sano measured the it with his hands and watched with success as Kaoru nearly choked on her food.

"S-Sanosuke! We're eating here!" She stuttered through a mouth full, and Sano laughed loudly at his affective-ness.

Yahiko had a different reaction though "Really Sano? Are you serious?" The teenager watched the older man with curiosity "What about the other bugs? Is it just cockroaches?"

"Yahiko!" Kaoru yelled pleadingly, obviously not wanting to talk about foot-long insects anymore. Sano closed his eyes again and absentmindedly rubbed at his temple, a slight frown showing on his face.

Just then Tae walked up to the table with the bill, and Kaoru sighed in relief at the sure change in subject.

"I'm glad to see you're back Sano-san. I was surprise when you left before, without even paying your bill..." she trailed off, giving Sanosuke 'the look'. To everyones' surprised, Sano just smiled and dug into his pocket, pulling out a coin bag and tossing it to the un expecting waitress.

"That should cover it." Was all he said as Tae and the others stared at him questioningly.

Finally Kenshin spoke up "You have money?"

That was what Sano was waiting for. "Yup. I helped out some govoernment official while in England, and he gave me all that as some kind of reward" He said, everyone staring dumbstruck. "There was more, but I had to set some aside, since it's all the money I have."

Sano paying off his bill at the Akobeko. It was a day that none of them ever thought they would see in a million years. Tae stood gaping at the money in her hand, her mouth closing and opening a little as words failed her. Sanosuke just sat back and enjoyed his victory.

> >> > >> > >> > >> > >>

"Do you really have to go already?" Yahiko stood on the engawa pouting slightly at the kenkaya who was preparing to leave. It had only been four hours since Sano had entered the dojo gate. They had come back after dinner and talked a while, but it was already getting late, and the stars were starting to show through the colors of the disappearing sunset.

"Yeah" Sano tried stifling a yawn "It's gettin' late, and I need to get some rest. It was a long trip back." He really didn't want to leave, but he thought it best as he was starting to feel the familiar pain forming in his temple again.

"You can stay here you know," said Kaoru, holding a sleeping Kenji on her hip. "We would be happy to have you stay."

"No thanks. I already rented out a new apartment." He would have said more, but he wanted to get out of there as fast as possible, as the pain in his head was getting steadily worse. He turned around and walked towards the gate. "I'll come back tomorrow, and we can talk more over breakfast. I promise." With that and a quick Sanosuke-grin, he quickly walked away.

Kaoru laughed to herself. "Of course you'll be here for breakfast" she shook her head slightly, still smiling softly. "Some things never change."

"Good night Sano, take care of yourself." Kenshin said as he watched the retreating back of his friend, the "aku" still swaying on the fabric of the mans jacket. Sanosuke hadn't changed much at all appearance wise, but Kenshin had seen that he had indeed matured over the course of five years around the world. Megumi had been watching from the door as Kenshin and Kaoru had said their good-byes, wanting to get some sleep herself. She had only barley noticed the discomfort Sano had been in that night, but she hadn't thought much of it. She walked inside with her friends and went to her room for some much needed sleep.

She hadn't been able to bring herself to say good-bye to Sano that night. She couldn't exactly say why, just that even though she knew better, it felt like if she did, if she said those two horrible words, he wouldn't come back... 'just like the last time'. 'But he did come back' she thought to herself. 'He was just here, and he'll be back tomorrow...' Still, 'good-bye' was something she just didn't want to say again. She slid into her futon and curled her legs up to herself, hugging her arms around them, and drifted off to sleep.

> >> > >> > >> > >> > >>

Sano entered the small apartment that he had managed to rent with the little money he had brought back from his travels. He immediately laid down on the floor, not even bothering to lay out a futon, and still completely dressed. His headache had gotten much worse, and his muscles were starting to ache along with it's throbing. He had been getting these headaches a week before he had even left for Japan, but then they had only been slight discomforts; simply a little pain that had been gone after only a few minutes. Now, however, they were much worse, and much more frequent. It was particularly bad that night.

He had thought about asking Megumi about it, but he really didn't want to bug her with something that probably just needed some rest to cure. Also, he didn't want to worry her. She had seemed so quiet that night, not the usual foxy opponent-in-words that she usually was. From what he had heard at the dojo, she had been very busy at the clinic, and he figured that she was stressed out enough with what was already on her plate. So he closed his eyes tightly, trying to extinguish the pain for one more night.

**A/N:** Meh, I told you it would be longer! Anyways, now the story is just getting started :) so here is some answers to the reviews that I got!

**Gabyhyatt:** Thank you, I'm glad you think so.  
**Nyako:** Thank you, and don't worry, there are going to be PLEANTY more chapters. I'm thinking of continuing this story throughout Sano and Megumi's relationship, and this is just where it starts.  
I'm even thinking of putting "Streets of Heaven" in here as well, so the one-shot can get a sequel )  
(For those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about, "Streets of Heaven" was my first S/M fanfic.  
**Bloody Angel X:** Thank you very much, I hope it can be.  
Anyways, I agree, the prologue was VERY short, but I think I made my point now that it was only the one ;) . Also, angst is my style, I don't mean for it to be, it's just everything I write tends to have it's angsty moments, eh heh heh. But I totally agree, I will try to stay away from the angst and focus this story on some brighter qualities :)

Thanks for reviewing!


	3. Catching Up

**Disclaimer:** I do not and probably never will own Rurouni Kenshin.  
My writing is just for pleasure and I do not make a profit. 

Sorry, no songs in this chapter.

**A/N:** +_Ponders to herself_+ Did you know that it took me almost two years to write this? Yup, I had the idea a long time ago and had already written the prologue and most of the first chapter (although I did a great deal of editing). I got discouraged and stopped writing it before I even posted it, and never really thought about it until recently. Now I'm addicted to writing this! I guess that can be a good and bad thing, heh. Well it really helped not needing to do the hard part: the beginning, since I had already written it nn. I'm so excited about the reviews I've been getting, it sounds like I have a lot of people with faith in me and my writing. I do want to apologize for the not-so-good writing style in the previous chapters though, I'm getting use to it again. If you've read "Streets of Heaven" then you probably know that my writing is usually better then this. Well it's been a while! So it'll get better as my hands and mind get use to the flow of writing again :) . Well anyways, here's the next chapter! Enjoy!

**I Lost You Once**

**Chapter 2: Catching Up**

The morning sunlight slowly began to peek through the thin rice-paper of the shoji screen, spreading its light across the room and onto the sleeping figure below. Sano sleepily opened his eyes halfway and stared at the wall opposite of him. The first thing he had noticed was his body aching mildly.

"What's wrong with me..?" He mumbled out loud to the empty room, the words slurred slightly do to his exhaustion. He hadn't been able to sleep much the night before and was still quite tired because of it. Reluctant to move, and at the moment just to tired to try, Sano laid there on his side and pondered to the wall. "Am I sick..? Dammit, I can't be sick, I just got back!" His headache seem to of disappeared during the night, but he still didn't feel much better off. After a few moments of silent resting, Sanosuke carefully turned over and slowly started to stand up, despite his muscles' stubborn protests. He slowly shook the sleep away, hoping the movement wouldn't start up another headache, and walked out of the small building. The sky was bright and flawless out side, nothing less of a mid-summer's morning, and Sanosuke had to shield his eyes for a moment to get use to the light. Everything around him seemed to be perfect except for him. '_Figures. I just had to be sick on a perfect day._' Sano sighed heavily to himself.

Sick, no he couldn't be sick, heaven knows he didn't want to spend his first week home sick! So, stuffing his hands deep into his pockets, he began his walk to the Dojo; dismissing the idea as fast as it had come. He made a note in the back of his mind to make a visit to Katsu's place after he left the dojo, that is, if his old friend still lived there. After a while of walking, he became use to the aches in his joints and he silently cursed his apartment for being so far away from his destination. Finally after a few more minutes, Sano found himself, once again, in front of the wooden gate of the kenjitsu school, and entered.

Kaoru was sitting on the porch with Kenji napping in her lap, as she criticized Yahiko's practice swings here and there. Yahiko was getting annoyed and was trying to hold his temper by swinging his shinai harder and harder with each stroke. As for Kenshin, he was nowhere to be seen in the yard, but the smell of breakfast lingering in the air told Sanosuke were the red-haird swordsman was.

"Ohayo Sano, Kenshin's inside making breakfast." Kaoru said, noticing him enter the yard. Sanosuke silently thanked Kenshin for talking Kaoru into letting him cook that morning, and just as the thought crossed his mind, Kenshin slid open the shoji screen.

"Ohayo Sano. Breakfast is ready Kaoru, de gozaru."

"I guess I'm here right on time then, ne?" Sano walked over to the engawa.

"I still don't see why I couldn't have cook breakfast." Kaoru pouted slightly up at her husband.

"Because you'd kill us all!" Yahiko said as he made a gagging gesture.

"Yahikoooooo! Who asked you!"

"You asked!"

"Baka! I was talking to Kenshin!"

"Maa maa, Kaoru, we should eat before breakfast gets cold.."

Sano stood and watched with some amusement while Kenshin tried in vain to persuade his wife to let Yahiko go and come inside. Finally though, Sano's stomach got the better of him and his patience ran thin.

"Com' on lets eat." Sano said, and with one swift motion, grabbed Kenshin by the back of his gi and dragged the man into the dojo with a trail of 'oro's behind them. "When you leave, they'll follow."

Sure enough, by the time the two of them had even reached the eating area, Kaoru and Yahiko had already sped past and seated themselves on the floor, and competitively glared at the other from across the low standing table, each muttering about ugly tanukis and little brats.

Breakfast was a lot like it use to be. Kaoru and Yahiko fighting while Kenshin tried to calm them down and Sanosuke snuck food onto his plate. The only thing different this time was the mini-Kenshin in Kaoru's lap, who would reach out with both of his little arms and his mouth wide open for his mothers food every time she lifted the chopsticks, and would receive a little bit here and there. Sanosuke was amazed at how much alike this child and his father looked, and it seemed like he had missed a lot while he was gone. He decided it was finally about time to get caught up.

"So when did you two tie the knot anyway?" He directly asked the couple, and Kaoru looked up and over from feeding Kenji a bit of her rice.

"Three years next December." She said kindly, going back to feeding herself.

"We would have invited you, but..."

Sano cut off Kenshin's sentence "But I was half-way across the map. Don't worry about it, it's not like you could have done anything." He paused a moment to think of another question. "What about the dojo? Did you ever get any new students, Jou-chan?"

Kaoru looked up again and a large smile spread over her face. "Actually, yes! Well, there isn't any practice today... but I have about ten students now!"

Yahiko also joined in on the new topic "And I'm the assistant teacher; although some of the students can be really annoying to teach..."

"Yes, they remind me so much of a certain student of mine..." Kaoru said under her breath.

Yahiko and Kaoru continued to talk on about their new success in the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu, but at this point, Sano wasn't quite able to keep up. His headache was back with vigor, and he could feel the sweat forming behind his headband. He absentmindedly whipped his forehead with his sleeve before the sweat could escape the red fabric to roll down his face. To put it plainly, he felt like crap; he ached, and no longer had an appetite. So as Yahiko and Kaoru were now arguing over who was the better kenjitsu teacher, Kenshin watched his friend look very uncomfortable and sick.

"Sano, are you alright?"

Kenshin's words caught the attention of the other two and now everyone at the table, even Kenji with a clueless look, were staring at the Kenkaya, waiting for an answer. Sano just looked at them all with a faked smile. No, he was not alright.

"Yeah I'm fine." He left it at that, set down his chopsticks, and stood up. "I've gotta go though, I wanted to stop by Katsu's," he said scratching the back of his neck, "it's been a while." He quickly made it to the shoji screen, hoping that they would drop the topic of his health and let him go.

"Maybe afterwards you should pay a visit to the clinic, Sano. Megumi-dono wanted to check on your hand anyway, de gozaru."

Sano sighed slightly; he didn't want to bother her, but Kenshin was right, it was about time he said something to the fox. Besides, it had been a long time since he had paid one of his traditional visits to the clinic, and he had missed it. With that decided, Sano stepped out and through the gate, and made his way down the street to his friends house.

> >> > >> > >> > >> > >>

Tsukioka Katsuhiro walked down the side of the road, towards the slums of downtown Tokyo, where he had lived for the past two years. It had been a long day, and it was now around five o' clock. Katsu had finally given up on his daily eavesdropping, and was on his way home after not finding a single thing for his paper. Yes, he still kept up his anti-government paper, even after receiving warnings and threats. Katsu was not about to let his work down, especially after his best friend had been forced to flee the country because one of the governments corrupt politicians. He turned the corner and onto the street were the small apartment that he called home was located. However, about twenty feet away from his home, Katsu stopped in mid step, without any noticeable change in expression evident on his face. There was someone outside his door, and Katsu took a minute to scrutinize his unknown guest before he advanced. Tall, lanky, messy hair, white clothes; the realization came striking past him, and the smallest of gasps rang through his throat. It wasn't a stranger after all.

"Sanosuke..?" Katsu watched as his long time best friend turned in his direction. "What.. when did you get back?" Katsu finally found his feet and walked towards Sanosuke, watching as a grin spread across the taller mans face.

"Yesterday morning; I would have come over sooner, but I had some other places to go first." A small smile showed on Katsu's lips as he walked the rest of the distance to his front door and pulled out his key from the pocket of his coat, which he wore even in the heat of summer..

"Glad to see I'm so high on your list." The key turned and the shoji slid open (Do shoji screens have key holes?), and the two former Sekihoutai members walked inside.

"Hey, you were high enough on my list for me to wander around all of Tokyo for hours. You moved!"

Katsu smiled slightly "Yes, my old place was getting too well known. I was tired of all the unfriendly mail."

The walls of the small one-roomed building were covered with newspaper clippings, ranging from old to very recent and all seemed to be about the same subject.

"I see you're keeping up that anti-government paper, Katsu." Sano said as he read some of the articles to himself, absentmindedly rubbing the sweat from his forehead and pressing a finger against his temple for the tenth time that day. He sat down cross legged on the floor in his usual place in front of the low standing table, which was stationed in the middle of the room. This too was also covered with stacks of paper, brushes, ink, and discarded news clippings; all an obvious sign of a writers work area. Katsu fumbled through a few of the documents and cleared off the surface of the table, setting down in place of the mess a large bottle of sake and two cups.

"I thought this would be a good way to say 'welcome back'." Katsu said with a narrow look and a sly smile that suited the man perfectly, and he began to pour two rounds. Sanosuke stared down at the drink with a crooked smile. That was just what he needed right now. He reached out and picked up one of the two filled cups, downing it in one go.

"Damn right." He said, refilling his cup. Katsu did the same and the two former Sakihoutai members started to talk away about the recent events that Sano had missed since he left. After a few more drinks and a good thirty minutes later, Katsu started to notice that Sanosuke's hand was shaking.

"Sano, you're shaking, I thought you could hold your liquor better then that." He said with a sarcastic undertone, knowing very well that wasn't the reason for the movement, but thought it was the best way to approach the subject. That's when he noticed that it wasn't just Sano's hand, but almost his friends entire body that was shaking mildly. "Ne, Sano... are you alright?"

Sanosuke lifted his wrist up to eye level and wrapped a hand around it; trying, and failing, to make himself stop shaking. He had noticed it a while ago, but had hoped that his friend wouldn't have seen. Sano started to worry now, this wasn't the first time that he had had a shaking fit, and it wasn't just the shaking. He could also feel a twinge in the pit of his stomach going up to the back of his throat that made him think that he was about to vomit. Katsu was looking more and more concerned at his friend, and found himself at Sanosuke's side the instant he saw the Kenkaya shove a hand over his mouth in order not to loose his breakfast.

"Yeah, I.." Sano mumbled quietly, removing his hand to brush the sweat from his forehead. "I think I might be sick, for a while now." It was the first time he had outwardly admitted the obvious.

"You _think_ you _**might**_ be?" Katsu pushed away Sano's hand to replace it with his own instantly feeling that it was very hot to the touch. "You have a fever, you need to go to a clinic." He stood and helped his friend up, and persuaded him to move towards the door. The two went on their way down the vacant streets in the direction of the clinic, both lucky that it was now late enough for no one to be around and in their way, and unlucky because of the growing darkness. All the while Sano seemed to lean forward more and more in an attempt to defeat his nausea.

"Dammit" He mumbled softly to himself, he had hoped that this would have all passed over, but it looked like there was no way out of it now. He was sick, really sick, and he needed to get some help before it got any worse then it was already becoming. His shaking had become steadily worse, and he could feel the pools of sweat roll down his face and back. To top it all off, his vision was swirling around the darkness of the streets, and he almost tripped over something that he couldn't even see. "_Dammit!_" He felt Katsu's hands on his shoulders, keeping him steady. He didn't understand, he didn't feel nearly this bad a moment ago, and now all of a sudden he was on his way to the clinic, leaning on his friend for support and also so he wouldn't stray from the path due to his dizziness. He felt so helpless. "Dammit..."

Katsu was really worrying now, he had never seen Sanosuke like this before, and he hoped he would never have to again. He watched his friend visibly shake in violent, uncontrollable chills, and sweat was staring to show through the white fabric of his clothes. His step was a little off, as if the path in front of his own eyes was moving from side to side as he struggled to keep up with it, and Katsu tried to steady him as best he could. Sanosuke was now leaning heavily onto Katsu's shoulder, slumped over a bit and his eyes halfway closed as if any minute he would fall into unconsciousness. "Dammit" Katsu had heard him say in an almost inaudible whisper, and he felt his own pulse quicken substantially, and a bead of sweat made it's way down the side of his face.

"You're going to be fine Sano. Takani-sensai with make you better, ne?" Katsu forced a shadow of a smile onto his face, but failed horribly at removing even the tiniest hint of concern or worry.

"Megumi..."

Katsu's eyes widened for a split second, and he quickened their paise as much as he could to get there faster. As they turned the last corner, Katsu thanked the heavens at the sight of the small clinic. The lights were still on; someone was still there.

**A/N:** Meh, sorry minna-san, I would have made it longer but this seemed to be the best place to cut it off nn'. Someone was just telling me how when I called it a 'musical' it sounds like the characters are the ones who sing, and that he could just imagine "The Rurouni Kenshin Broadway Show". This cracked me up, but unfortunately this isn't that kind of musical. I just mean that some of the chapters are song fics. So sorry guys, so singing Kenshin or Sano (although surprisingly Sano sings a lot in the series, and Kenshin even sang once! So kawaii nn) Anyways, cheers to the reviewers! Kenpai!

**Lara:** Yes, I'm also a huge fan of Sano and Megumi, in fact, the first fanfic I ever wrote was about Sano, and then the second one was "Streets of Heaven" then this one and it probably won't be the last ;). I hope you enjoyed this chapter!  
**Ninie-san:** I'm glad you're enjoying it! Don't worry you'll find out soon enough.  
**Crewel:** Hello S/M superfans! I am one of you! lol, you're review really moved me. I was so excited that you were happy that I was writing again and that you knew me from my previous S/M fanfiction. I feel like I'm known :) ! Anyways, I'll keep it up.  
**Saitouu Ryuuji:** Thanks, and don't worry you will.  
**Roosterboy:** I love your name! lol. Thank you thank you, I'm hoping that the plot continues to be great, and I totally agree that there aren't enough S/M fanfiction out there, I'm actually thinking about reverting my web site into a Sano/Megumi fanfiction archive, and hopefully that will bring in a lot of them into one place. But first I have to learn PHP.. I'll update as soon as I can:) I'm glad you like this story so much!  
**Fox-san:** Thank you! Wow that's the first time someone has thought of my writing style was amazing :D thank you and I'll try t keep it up!  
**Starry Night Blue:** lol, don't worry, I maybe capable of doing many mean things in my fanfictions, but killing off Sano is definitely not one of them, however he is going to be sick alright, you should find out what it is soon.  
**Megumi:** Don't worry, I love Sano as much as the next girl ;) so it'll end up okay.  
**Sanodevil:** Thank you! Don't worry, of course she will )  
**Meg-chan:** Thank you, I'll try to keep it up :)

Thank you again for reviewing! See you next chapter!


	4. The Chills

**Disclaimer:** I do not and probably never will own Rurouni Kenshin.  
My writing is just for pleasure and I do not make a profit. 

Also, I do not own the song "Save Me Tonight" and I did edit it from it's original form.

**A/N:** Konnichi wa minna-san. Here's chapter three! I know that the recent chapters have been kind of lacking in Sano/Megumi goodness, so hopefully I can get some of the much needed fluffiness in here, although I'll make sure I don't go overboard. In this chapter, you finally find out what it is that Sano has, it's no big surprise or anything and I just want to say right now that, although the symptoms that I use are actually symptoms, the order and amount of time in which they appear is a little off. So go with it for know, I actually did a pretty good job making it accurate though. Enjoy!

**I Lost You Once**

**Chapter 3: The Chills**

It had been a long day at the Ogura clinic (yes, that is the actual name of the clinic). Megumi sighed a little to herself as she picked up a roll of bandages that had been carelessly dropped onto the floor, and walked over to the supply cabinet to put them back in their rightful place. It was getting late, and the quickly darkening light which filtered through the shoji screen made it quite clear.

"Yahiko, you should probably head back to the Dojo. It's getting dark." Megumi pointed out to the teenager who was helping her tidy up before closing.

Yahiko had been helping her with some supply shopping earlier that day, and after an unfortunate run-in with some local thugs (one of the reasons the boy escorted her in the first place), he had ended up with a few bumps and scratches. So they had both returned to the clinic, and Megumi had obligedly cleaned him up a bit.

"Yeah, you're probably right." He said, putting the last of the days shopping bounty into it's rightful spot within the supplies. "I'm done anyway."

"Thank you again." She said, putting away the shopping basket "The day was made a lot easier with your assistance." She smiled kindly at him, receiving an embarrassed look on the boy's featuresat the comment as he absentmindedly rubbed at the back of his neck.

"Takani-sensei!"

It was an all too familiar plea, although the voice was new to her, Megumi had become blatantly use to it. That, however, didn't make the situation any less potentially serious, and Megumi quickly turned her view towards the shoji screen, which had been thrown open. A small gasp escaped her to ring across the room, and she instinctly lifted a hand to her mouth to stifle it. At the door, stood a very worried looking man that Megumi didn't know, and a bent over form leaning heavily against him.

"Sa- Sanosuke..?"

Sanosuke was doubled over, breathing heavily, as slow rasps of air struggled to get in and out of his lungs. His whole body was drenched with sweat, and he was shaking violently from top to bottom as he made a hard effort to stay standing at least a little. It seemed that the only thing keeping him up was the supportive arm of his friend which was wrapped around Sano's waist, keeping the Kenkaya from collapsing to the floor, while Sano's right arm was placed around the man's neck.

Yahiko was the first one able to find words to speak, "What happened!"

It was the small push that Megumi needed to snap into doctor-mode, and she quickly cleared the distance of the room over to the two men in the doorway.

"H-he's sick." The man of few words said, unable to explain much else. Megumi put a hand on Sanosuke's forehead, and quickly drew it away from the heat.

"Well that's obvious!" Yahiko shouted, now also on the other side of the room.

"He has a high fever. You," She said, directing her attention to the stranger who quickly introduced him self as Katsu, "Katsu-san, bring him in here." She directed him to the room that she was walking into. "Yahiko, get some cold water and cloths."

The two of them nodded at their orders and went to work. Megumi helped Katsu lay the half-conscious Sano onto a futon in the center of the floor, and remove his sweat-drenched shirt. Yahiko came in only moments later with a bucket of water and cloths, setting it down next to the futon. Megumi dipped one of the piece of white cloth into the cool liquid and placed it on Sano's forehead, hoping that the cool touch would help bring the fever down, an she quickly began to examine his symptoms.

Sanosuke was still breathing heavily, and even though he was no longer moving, his body continued to shake viciously against him. His eyes were closed, and Megumi assumed that he had passed out from the strain being put on his weakened state. Her fists tightened in her lap, turning her knuckles white, and she was surprised by herself as a familiar feeling tugged at her heart and she felt a wetness forming in the corners of her eyes. '_What's come over me?_' She thought, practically scolding herself mentally '_Why is this affecting me so much?_' She bit back the urge to cry out of worry, and at the same time, anger at her silly emotions. She couldn't breakdown like this, not in front of people. So she quietly drew in a breath and spoke, keeping her voice as steady as she could.

"Yahiko, go home and tell Ken-san and Kaoru-chan what happened." The teenager nodded and stood up, looking down at the doctor with a worried expression.

"Will Sano be alright Megumi-san?"

Would he? She didn't know, and although she had a hunch on what was wrong, she still needed to be sure. She couldn't go on examining with those two in the room though, not with her emotions tangled up as they were. So she put on a small smile and tried to add a tone of confidence to her voice.

"I'm sure he will. Tori-atama here is too stubborn not to be." She said, hoping to fool herself as well, but deep down she knew that people were not invincible, no matter how strong they were on the outside. Yahiko gave a quick 'take care' and left; determined to spread the news to the others as soon as he got back. This left Katsu, and Megumi turned to him now, trying hard to keep the same under controlled look on her face.

"As for you Katsu-san, thank you for bringing him here, but you should go home also."

"But-"

"Please." There was a hint of sharpness in her voice, and Megumi surprised herself once again. "I'll take care of him." She assured the man, softening her voice a little and ridding it of the harshness. Katsu hesitated, but finally gave in and slowly stood up, leaving the same way he had come.

Megumi let out a breath that she didn't know she was holding when she heard the shoji slide shut, and looked down at the sleeping figure in front of her. Sanosuke was still shaking silently, although not as much as he had been, but even though his breathing came a bit easier, the effort was still labored. She hated seeing him like this; so sick, and so weak. She wanted to help him, to somehow magically make whatever it was that ailed him to disappear. He looked so fragile laying there, nothing compared to the brash, ruffian that he was, and it was like seeing a side of him that she didn't know was there. Before she even realized, she had placed an ivory hand gently on his cheek, savoring the touch of his skin against her own. She held it there, slowly brushing her fingertips along his jaw-line, and feeling the sweat that clung to his face.

"Kitsune..."

Megumi quickly drew her hand away; but before she could remove it, Sano had lifted a shaking hand to hold it in place. She stared at him for a few seconds, shoulders tense; and even though his eyes were still closed, she felt like his gaze was piercing into her. Sano's grasp on her hand was loose, and she could feel it shivering against her's as he tried to keep it there against his fatigue. Finally after a few moments, Megumi relaxed and spoke soothingly to him, taking his hand into both of hers to try and calm its shaking.

"Yes, Tori-atama, I'm right here. Are you feeling any better?"

"It's Malaria... isn't it."

It was a not a question, and her eyes widened at the words, she hadn't expected that at all. Megumi lowered her head to stared at the floor, trying to hid the look that she knew was in her eyes.

"How did you know?"

"Fever.. headaches.. shaking.. nausea.. sweating.. dizziness..." He listed the symptoms slowly, opening his eyes half way to stare at the ceiling. "I was warned about it in several countries. I'm guessing I got it in Peru." He paused a moment to catch his breath "Guess I screwed up... sorry Megitsune." Megumi bit her lip and watched as he slowly closed his eyes again, his hand going limp in her own.

"Why didn't you come in earlier?" The words came softly and she didn't expect an answer, knowing that Sano had fallen asleep from exhaustion. She placed his hand gently down at his side and stood; she needed to make some medicine to help his body fight off the disease. It was Malaria, that was sure; it wouldn't have been so bad if it wasn't for how far in he was. Out of the three stages of the illness, cold stage, hot stage, and sweating stage, he was at the end of the middle one, making his road to recovery a thin and darkening one as he slowly got closer to a critical case. Megumi walked slowly to the supply cabinet, head bent down and eyes focused on the floor. She tumbled through some of the herbs and removed a moiter from its shelf, sitting down at her usual place and she began mixing them together.

> >> > >> > >> > >> > >>

For the next few weeks Sanosuke was bed-ridden, Megumi made sure that he would not leave his bed and frankly, most of the time he was unable to do so. Several times, he would slip into a bout of shakes and fevers, and a few times, Megumi had even caught him running into the bathroom to throw up what little food he was able to make himself eat. For two weeks, Megumi tried to avoid his room, only going in to check on his fever an to give him his medicine. She couldn't trust herself to not breakdown if she stayed in his room any longer then necessary, ever since the night he had gone into delusion.

>>>

Megumi had been sitting at her desk late at night, finishing up some of the paperwork that had accumulated there during her full-time dedication to the very sick tori. Ever since he had come in, she had been right by his side, not able to sleep and not hungry to eat while Sanosuke laid there in his room. She had finally pulled herself away so she could finish filing the work that desperately needed to be done.

The candlelight flickered across the paper as she dipped the brush into the black pool of ink. The tip hovered over the parchment, as Megumi decided what she was going to write down, and just as she had began to lower the brush, she had heard the door slide open. She jumped slightly at the sound, and looked up to see Sanosuke leaning on the door frame, still sweating and shaking as violently as before.

"Tori-atama! You need to stay in bed you still have a fever-"

"Where am I?" He demanded weakly, and Megumi's eyes widened as she stared at his determined, half opened eyes. "We need to move the supplies. It's going to rain..." His voice was low and slurring, and there was no tone in it at all. He slouched forward a bit, and Megumi rushed over to keep him up before he managed to collapse. She knew what was going on, he was delusional, a sure sign that he was not getting better.

"Come on Sano, you need more rest." And with that, she started to lead him back to his room, doing her best to hold him up, and trying to ignore his meaningless babbling as they made their way down the hall.

"They killed them all... bastards." Megumi looked over at him, his head was drooped and his eyes were staring unfocused at the floor. "Damn Ishin Shishi."

What was he talking about? She wasn't sure, and half of her insisted that it was just more delusional babble, but she noticed his demeanor change from when he had come into the room. His voice had taken on a mournful tone, much different from the nothingness that plagued his voice before, and his eyes seemed deep and determined. Megumi slid open the door to his room and walked him to his futon, gently pressing on his shoulder to make him lay down.

"Get some rest Tori-atama." She watched his brown eyes shift over to look at her, and they stayed there for a while, as if he was taking in every detail of her face. She looked away, not able to keep her eyes on his, and she felt a shaking hand brush against her cheek, making her go ridged.

"Damn you're beautiful..."

Megumi felt a blush rise onto her delicate features. He was delusional, and that was all. He didn't know what he was saying, right? It felt so nice, though, his hand against her cheek, it was amazing how soft and gentle his calloused hands were. She felt his hand brush away a tear that had formed in the corner of her eye, and she snuggled closer to it, feeling his skin shiver on her cheek.

"Megumi..."

She slowly pulled away and stood up, walking over to the door without looking back at him, only stopping at the shoji.

"You need to rest."

And she left, sliding the shoji screen shut behind her. She stood there, leaning against the wall next to his room, and she felt her feet slowly give way. Megumi slid down the wall and curled her legs up against her chest, laying her head on her knees, and let the tears fall silently.

>>>

That had been two weeks ago, and ever since she had been avoiding the hurt that she felt in her heart, not able to face the ache that she felt, knowing what she couldn't bring herself to admit. Sano wasn't getting better, he was dying, and she was terrified of loosing him. She had never realized just how much Sanosuke meant to her until now, as she stared the possibility of losing him right in the face. She was scared, and she knew that she couldn't bare to loose him.

Megumi dropped her brush onto the desk, and stood up, feeling a strong urge to check in on him at that very moment. Without knowing why, she made her way down the hall, and quietly slid open his door.

Sanosuke was laying with his back facing her, his blankets had been tossed to the side during the night and were laying in a heap on the floor, soaked in his sweat. She watched as his body continued to shake more than usual, and she could see the sweat glistening on his neck as he trembled viciously against his futon. She could take it anymore; she could stand there and watch him shake like that. Before she could rationalize her thoughts, Megumi had swiftly crossed the room and flung her arms around his shivering body, pulling him close to her, trying to make him stop. His body was so warm against hers, and she sat there on her knees, his back against her chest, and her arms securely around him, tightening their hold the more he shook. She rested her chin on his shoulder, leaning him against her as she rested her back against the wall.

"Me- Megumi..?"

_You could set me free   
you could rescue me   
if you just hold out your hand   
I can't let go   
please don't say no   
if you give up on me   
I'll be dyin'_

"Shh, Sanosuke. I'm right here, don't worry." She rocked slowly, running a hand through his thick brown hair, as she cursed the tears that fell freely down her cheeks. He never called her by her name, and she found that she loved the way it sounded on his voice.

"I-I'm sorry.. Megitsune."

"You have nothing to be sorry about Sano."

"I n-never said good-bye to you..."

_Save me tonight,  
I don't know how much more I can take it   
Baby save me tonight, hold on  
Without you, I'm not gonna make it, on my own_

Megumi's eyes widened; he was talking about when he left Japan, how he had never gone to Aizu to say good-bye. She had been so hurt inside when she found out that he had left with out a word to her. It had felt even worse then when Kenshin had left for Kyoto; and she had felt so alone. Had he not forgotten her at all? Had the fact that he had never gone to see her been haunting him this whole time? She felt the tears well up in side as she clung tighter to him, faking a tiny laugh.

"Tori-atama, I don't like good-byes, so just don't leave again, ne?" The words came out in a soft, pleading whisper, and she felt how badly she didn't want him to go, to leave her.

Sanosuke's weak and shaking voice cut through her thoughts.

"I was afraid.. that if I s-saw you, I wouldn't be ab-ble to get on that boat..."

The tears came freely now, and she buried her face into his hair to hide them, breathing in his sent as she brushed her wet cheeks against the brown main of messy hair.

"Sanosuke..."

_If you give up on me,  
I'll be dyin'  
Save me tonight,  
I don't know how much more I can take it   
Baby save me tonight,  
hold on without you,  
I'm not gonna make it I know we can make it_

There was no reply, just the soft sounds of his struggled breathing. Megumi rested her chin on his shoulder, and closed her eyes, whispering softly to him before letting sleep consume her.

"I lost you once Sanosuke, please, just don't leave me again."

_Save me tonight   
I don't know how much more I can take it   
Baby save me tonight   
hold on, without you,  
I'm not gonna make it   
Save me tonight..._

**A/N:** Aw man, that was kind of sad ne? My evil side is showing, eh heh heh, I promise to make a happier chapter next time. I edited the song a little, well, basically I took out some parts, since in the story the song is more from Megumi's perspective, and the song is actually sung by a guy. So I had to take out some of it nn' but I think it works out well with it all don't you? Well, that's pretty much all I have to say. Cheers to the reviewers! Kenpai!

**Lara:** Hehe, yes I know, cliff-hangers are evil! Thank you very much for the comment on my writing, I also think it's getting better :) and yes, don't worry, there will be plenty of love coming up soon in the chapters, I just need the right situation in the story to write it ;) .  
**Crewel:** Once again, thank you so much for your wonderful support. I loved the e-mail I got, and I adored the pictures :) ! I'm so glad that you are enjoying my story, and I'll try to update as much as I can! Also, I read that story, and I loved it a lot! I'm hoping the next chapter is up soon.  
**Megumi:** That is exactly what a writer wants to hear. I am thrilled that I'm touching your emotions with my words, and that the plot is keeping you interested. It only get better!  
**Nyako:** Thank you, I was also very happy with how I wrote Sanosuke ad Katsu's friendship. Katsu is one of my favorite characters (I'm a Sekihoutai fan, I love Sano, Katsu, and Sagara-taishou) so I write him pretty well I think. Don't worry this chapter is filled with a good amount of Sano and Megumi. I didn't really have a chance in the other chapters to bring the two together, but now that Megumi has to take care of the Tori-atama, there is sure to be plenty :) .  
**Lucerito-del-alma:** Heh, sorry about the cliff! I totally agree with you, they are evil, but they are also very tempting ;) hehe.  
**Starry Night Blue:** Yes, Sano is very sick, and I can easily write people dying, but I love Sano too much :) along with some of the other characters.  
**Roosterboy:** Thank you! I'm glad that you enjoyed it and I also though it would be a good ending ;)

Domo arigatou gozaimasu! See you next chapter!


	5. Something To Live For

**AN:** I began writing this story a long long time ago on a desktop computer that has sent died and here I am looking over my fanfiction files on my second sense-then laptop and holy-cow look what I found! I don't remember writing this long lost chapter to this once-upon-a-time fic, but here it is!

When I first wrote this fic I had all kinds of ideas for it, and unfortunately those ideas will never be realized. I haven't though about Rurouni Kenshin in years, and this high school student from chapter 1 is now sporting a degree and a lot more college in the future. I'm putting this fic to rest, but for those of you who have waited all this time to see the end, here it is.

**I Lost You Once**

**Chapter 4: Something To Live For  
**

The morning sunshine was shining warmly onto the floorboards, painting lines of light across the wood and drifting across the faces of the two people lying there. Sanosuke slowly cracked an eye open, and followed with the next, staring confusingly at the wall on the other side of the room. He was sitting up, his back leaning on something soft and warm behind him, and soon the memories of the previous night flooded his mind. He lifted a hand and whipped the sweat away from his face, noticing that for the first time in a long time he wasn't shaking, though his fever was still blazing away with all its might.

He turned his head slightly to see that Megumi was still asleep, her head on his shoulder. He smiled inwardly at the sight of her delicate face so close to his, and brushed away some out-of-place ebony hair from her cheek ever so gently. She shifted a little, and for a moment part of Sanosuke was worried that she would wake up, and yet another part of him wouldn't have minded at all if she did. Sure enough, Megumi's cinnamon eyes slowly fluttered open.

"Hey kitsune."

She jumped just a little, realizing who it was that was in her arms, and she remembered how she had run in the night before. A blush ran across her ivory cheeks at their position, and she wanted to jump away in embarrassment but resisted, knowing that she was the only thing keeping Sanosuke up. Her muscles relaxed against him and she shifted slightly to a more comfortable position.

"Good morning Tori-atama. Did you sleep well?" Megumi yawned despite herself, and pressed her forehead against his back to hide it.

Sanosuke smiled to himself, and a small laugh escaped him. "Fine, did you?"

Megumi blushed again, feeling the blood rush to her face and tinting it a deep pink. He was probably just loving this, knowing how embarrassed she was, and she shifted again. There was no way her wit could get her out of this one. "Fine."

"That's good." His voice took on a victorious tone and Megumi knew that he was smiling broadly. His body froze up and she felt him lean forward as he tried with all his might not to vomit. He managed to keep it in and Megumi leaned forward to hold his back straight, absentmindedly rubbing his back as he fought to defeat his nausea. Sanosuke began to shake again, and leaned back into Megumi, breathing heavily. "Dammit."

"You need more rest Tori-atama."

"But... it's damn cold in that futon."

"Baka, it's the middle of summer!"

"It's still cold..."

Megumi noticed a trace of frustration in his voice, and figured that he didn't know why either. She sighed a bit; it had to be chills, yet another symptom of Malaria. It was another smack in the face that he was sick. She wanted so much to stay by him, to watch over him and discover more about this new found feeling she had, but she had work to do, and other patients to look after. Reluctantly, Megumi stood up, helping Sanosuke to stand up with her and led him back to his futon.

"I'll get you an extra blanket." With that she swiftly left the room.

Sanosuke lay there and stared after her as she left. This was very strange, the way the fox was acting, and he wondered what had brought her in the night before to embrace him as she did. Did she care for him? Maybe... love him? He shook his head slowly; Megumi would never love him, no matter what he felt. Although he had never outwardly admitted it, he knew exactly how he felt about the kitsune-sensei, and it scared him to think that she could return the feelings with his condition. He knew he could die from the disease that inhabited him, and it wouldn't be fair to her if he died with her feelings the way they were. 'What am I thinking! Her feelings? She couldn't love me, she's a doctor and I'm a ruffian. She doesn't love me.'

Or did she?

He rolled over on his side and tried to fall asleep, hoping that it would be the end of his stupid thoughts. A few minutes went by and he heard Megumi's footsteps enter the room, and he pretended that he wasn't awake. She placed the extra blanket on him and walked back to the shoji.

"Oyasumi, Sanosuke."

_Sanosuke._ His name on her voice echoed through his mind like a soft serenade, it sounded so wonderful to hear her say it, and soon he drifted of to it's sound.

Megumi made her way into the main room of the clinic to see if she was needed, and spotted Kenshin at the door. She stopped in her steps and looked at him, it had been weeks since she had seen any of her friends, and she hadn't expected to see him there.

"Ken-san, what are you doing here? Are you hurt?" She could already tell he wasn't, and the redhead looked over to her and gave her a smile.

"No, I'm fine Megumi-dono. I just came down to see how you were doing, everyone's worried about you, de gozaru." Megumi felt a pang of guilt rise in her.

"I've been a bit busy lately..."

"How is he?"

The voice was kind and gentle, but the words were anything but, and Megumi had to look away from him. It seemed everything reminded her of Sanosuke's condition and how sick he was. She wasn't really sure what she should say. Kenshin read the silence and his eyes looked a little sadder, despite the smile on his face, and he walked over to Megumi to place a hand on her shoulder.

"Don't worry Megumi-dono, Sano is strong, de gozaru na." He paused a moment and turned to leave, walking up to the door. "But I think now more then ever, he needs someone to remind him of what he has to live for."

Megumi looked over at him, surprised by his words, and watched as he exited the clinic with a polite 'take care'. Kenshin's words rang through her mind over and over again, as she listened to the deeper meaning they held. _What he has to live for_, there was so much, so many people... and there was her. He had to live for her. Megumi bit back a tear and lifted her chin, walking into the main examining room where Gensai-sensei would be.

The elderly man looked up from stitching a woman's hand as she entered the room, and a kind smile spread onto his aged face. Megumi gave his a small smile that only lasted a second and then walked the rest of the way over to him.

"Hello Megumi-chan, did you sleep well last night?" There was a slight mischief in his voice that made her heart jump a little, and she figured that he had walked in and seen Sanosuke sleeping in her arms earlier that morning. She kept a placid face and sighed, making sure to keep her voice smooth.

"Is there anything for me to do today?"

"Kenshin-san was in the waiting room, but I guess you already talked to him. He brought Kaoru-chan down, she sprained her wrist and is waiting in the other room." He turned back to tending to his patient and finished off the stitch.

Megumi rubbed her temple and walked into the room, noticing right away that Kaoru was indeed sitting patiently for her. The minute the older woman had entered, Kaoru had jumped up and hugged her.

"Megumi-san! I haven't seen you in forever!" Megumi softly gave her a squeeze; hoping the young woman would let her go. She did, and they both sat down across from each other, Megumi taking Kaoru's wrist to inspect it. She didn't really have much to say, although there was a lot she could think of, the words just didn't make it to her lips, and the two of them sat in silence. Kaoru shifted uncomfortably, not looking at the older woman, and finally found the strength to speak.

"So how is Sano?"

There it was again; that question. Megumi decided to act cheerful this time, not wanting to show Kaoru the same weakness she had to Kenshin a few minutes ago, and gave her a small smile.

"He's doing a little better I think..." Megumi trailed off at how uncertain her words sounded, and hoped that Kaoru wouldn't notice. The girl was silent for a few moments, watching the older woman's eyes and trying to see beyond their defensive wall.

"You really care about him, don't you…?" The words came out softly and carefully, and Megumi hesitated before giving her a slight nod.

She did care about him, more then she had ever cared about someone before. She wanted to be closer to him, to find out more about him and to know that everything would turn out just fine, but deep down she knew things were never so certain, never so easy. She felt a small pain in her heart as she thought about him, and she wanted desperately to be back by his side once more, to make sure he was there. It scared her to think that every day was another chance for her to lose him, another chance for her to never tell him...

"Megumi-san, you're crying!"

Kaoru's voice broke through her thoughts and Megumi snapped back to attention, noticing the hot tears gliding down her cheeks. She blushed slightly and turned away, brushing the tears away with a steady hand.

"Gomen nasai Kaoru-chan, I don't know what's come over me." She tried to sound strong, not wanting to break down in front of the younger woman. She finished wrapping her wrist and gave her a weak smile. "There, that should do it. Please be more careful next time."

It was dark once more, as slivers of moonlight escaped through the shoji. Megumi rubbed at her temples, the feel of her tears from earlier still burning on her face. She desperately wanted to talk to someone, to be comforted, but who? Especially at this time of night? Once again, her feet found themselves in front of Sanosuke's door. She knew she couldn't _talk_ to him, but maybe, just maybe she could cry to him. Someone to comfort her, and maybe be comforted in return. Almost unconsciously, Megumi slid open the shoji screen and peered inside.

Sanosuke was sleeping with his back against the wall, his futon discarded across the floor, but every blanket was saved and wrapped securely around his shivering body. Megumi's heart fell at how cold he must of felt, and soon found herself across the room and plopping down onto his lap carefully, hoping not to wake him up just yet. His grip on the blanket was loose, so she wiggled the ends away and closed it around herself as well. It didn't take long for Sanosuke to wake up from the movement in his arms, and Megumi felt his body shift.

_It's amazing how you can speak right to my heart  
Without saying a word you can light up the dark  
Try as I may I could never explain  
What I hear when you don't say a thing_

Sanosuke lazily opened his eyes and found himself staring down at Megumi's head. He smiled inwardly to himself, and his muscles relaxed as he leaned back deeper against the wall.

"We should probably stop doing this Kitsune, I could get use to it." He said tiredly, his speech a little slurred.

Megumi didn't respond, instead she sunk her head into the fabric of the blanket, and slowly took his hands, wrapping his arms around herself, shaking slightly with what Sanosuke knew were silent tears. Sanosuke was a little taken aback by her actions, and gave her a quick squeeze with his arms, which were now around her shoulders; her hands still holding his.

"Megumi...?" For once he decided her name was best to use. He felt her sink into him, a sob escaping her and she continued to silently weep in his arms.

'She's crying...' Sanosuke thought, '...for me.' It wasn't fair to her, to get so close to him now with the possibility of death floating thickly in the air. She was crying because of him, and it pained him immensely to think that he was making her feel this way. It just wasn't fair to her...

"Megumi... maybe you should go..."

At that she fully turned around in the blankets, facing him with tear stricken cheeks.

"Sanosuke no baka!" Her voice broke from her sobs and her face faltered, her eyebrows twitching in sadness. She couldn't take it anymore; she couldn't leave him, not now. The expression on his face was that of surprise, and if the situation were different, she probably would have laughed. But the situation wasn't different; it was terrifying to her, the thought of loosing him. She clenched her teeth, as she tasted the next words on her tongue. "I need you..."

The tears came freshly down her face now, as she finally gave in to her emotions. She flung her arms around his neck and sobbed loudly into his shoulder. Sanosuke couldn't help it, he had to do something, so he slowly and carefully folded his arms tighter around her body in as strong of an embrace as his weakened body could allow. He buried his face into her silken hair, breathing in the wonderful fragrance of jasmine. He wanted to melt into her, to hold on harder, and he cursed how weak he had become. He could no longer hold himself back from the feelings welling up within him, as he finally threw caution to the wind. Slowly, he loosened his grip and pulled away, lifting her chin with his shacking hand, and locked eyes with hers.

"I'm not leaving" He whispered to her, closing the distance and brushing his lips over hers. She sank into his kiss and he leaned forward with her movement, his arms tight around her.

Sanosuke felt a fire in his veins despite the chills that plagued him, and within his tired heart he felt a small spark of strength, as though a shadow of his old stamina was struggling to break through. He couldn't believe they were here, together. He never wanted it to go away. For the first time in five years, he felt at home, and for the first time in so many long weeks, he felt hope within her arms. He could never make it through this, but maybe _they_ could.

The kiss ended sweetly and Megumi nestled her face in the crook of his neck and shoulder, a never ending amount of emotions flooding throughout her body. She stayed there for a few seconds, comforted by the silence they shared. Suddenly she let out a soft but wonderful laugh.

"You've stopped shaking."

Sanosuke smiled and kissed the top of her head, content in the moment they were sharing. He could never leave her alone, because he could never be without her. Even with the lingering chills and headaches, he felt a new life within him. She was his everything, and he couldn't keep it in any longer.

"Do you have any idea how much I love you?"

She looked up at him and smiled, "I have an idea."

They stayed together the rest of the night until the warm rays of sun danced upon the floorboards, wrapped up against the wall, never needing to move away. Within each others silence was a clear feeling of hope and a refreshed determinedness to meet the next day head on, knowing that they had tomorrow, together, to live for.

_The smile on your face lets me know that you need me  
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me  
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall  
You say it best when you say nothing at all_

_~End~_

**AN: **And there you have it folks! The idea is that he does in fact get better, though I decided to make that point something that is up to the readers to imagine. I wish to thank all the reviewers and the people who will be very happy when they get their story alert email, heh. I hope this ending is enough.

And who knows? Maybe someday I'll just _have_ to write one more chapter. We'll see...


End file.
